I got here from there - here being where I began my recent journey.
Where is here? A new day, as usually one day follows another.
Yesterday, as I woke to begin the journey that brought me here, I found myself in a wee state of confusion. Washington state actually but you know what I mean. :)
I am not use to getting up and having my own agenda. Most of my days are walking through the steps of driving, working and responsibilities. Some of the steps are giant, some are out of my comfort zone, some 'are what they are' but most of the steps fit me just fine.
I had more to do than time yesterday - typical. I accomplished what I could, then moved on to greeting the rest of my day.
Have you ever had to share your feelings when you weren't ready or prepared? Maybe you don't know where to begin or what the person you are facing is waiting to hear, what their expectations are. I try to take that into consideration before I respond.
To be honest, oftentimes I know exactly what I want to say but the words come out in a jumble as if I were Charlie Brown's school teacher. My mouth feels like mush as I stumble over words. I think my brain does not like to cooperate with my mouth, at least that's my theory.
~~
As the morning continued on, I went out to my car and found the windshield was frozen. I reached in my car and grabbed for the bottle of de-icer my son gave me. It helped with the outside of the windshield but I discovered that the inside had frost on it too. ...go figure! Perhaps if I drive this puppy out on the road where the sun is shining, the ice will melt faster and I can get on with my agenda.
....and so it was, I headed out onto the road having my windows rolled down so I could see cars and the road, along with continually taking wipes at the inside of the windshield so I could see more clearly. Thing is, when I reached my first stop, the car's windows were really not in drive mode. They were still frozen in areas causing blind spots and certainly not safe. The sun did what it could to assist but I should have done more before I left.
Same with my life....the road that I am moving on is unclear causing me to make turns and motions where I did not intend to. Like the sun, others that mean no harm when they attempt to assist me but it is my life after all, and I really do need to make it on my own.
Bottom line...I woke up with a feeling inside as I have most mornings, kinda sorta as if I am carrying a weight that is not intended to be mine. A way is coming out of this drought and I won't give up thinking that perhaps today might be that day. While this storm is breaking, I need to keep on heading on down the road of life, a life I know that has been patiently waiting for me.
To be honest, oftentimes I know exactly what I want to say but the words come out in a jumble as if I were Charlie Brown's school teacher. My mouth feels like mush as I stumble over words. I think my brain does not like to cooperate with my mouth, at least that's my theory.
~~
As the morning continued on, I went out to my car and found the windshield was frozen. I reached in my car and grabbed for the bottle of de-icer my son gave me. It helped with the outside of the windshield but I discovered that the inside had frost on it too. ...go figure! Perhaps if I drive this puppy out on the road where the sun is shining, the ice will melt faster and I can get on with my agenda.
....and so it was, I headed out onto the road having my windows rolled down so I could see cars and the road, along with continually taking wipes at the inside of the windshield so I could see more clearly. Thing is, when I reached my first stop, the car's windows were really not in drive mode. They were still frozen in areas causing blind spots and certainly not safe. The sun did what it could to assist but I should have done more before I left.
Same with my life....the road that I am moving on is unclear causing me to make turns and motions where I did not intend to. Like the sun, others that mean no harm when they attempt to assist me but it is my life after all, and I really do need to make it on my own.
Bottom line...I woke up with a feeling inside as I have most mornings, kinda sorta as if I am carrying a weight that is not intended to be mine. A way is coming out of this drought and I won't give up thinking that perhaps today might be that day. While this storm is breaking, I need to keep on heading on down the road of life, a life I know that has been patiently waiting for me.
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