Snow Globes

Don't you adore shaking snow globes and watching the snowflakes swirl then slowly drift onto whatever figurine or item are inside?

I don't collect them so don't put that on a list of my likes in case you are keeping track, but I have been enamored and fascinated by them since I was a child.

I feel like I am holding a snow globe in my hand. Only, I have my hand open rather than cupping the snow globe. The snow globe represents my hope, my faith in my tomorrow. I am hesitating the gripping process while the snowflakes are still swirling, unsure where the snowflakes may fall and uncertain what object or future will be revealed.

I must be more of a concrete thinker. I need things in black and white and to the point. I require facts where maybe and possibility live.

There have been too many times in my past where I believed in the possibilities only to watch them become impossibilities.

I want to be excited.
I want to believe.
I am holding back -
waiting
watching
listening

In the meantime, am I really living? kinda sorta

Am I wrong to not take that leap and embrace the faith that lives inside of me while I move forward in trust and belief?

Am I wrong to shelter my emotions that are still so fragile?