God is working everywhere and doesn't take days off. Oh, you already knew that. :)
Last week I headed out on my final destination of grand adventures for the summer. I flew. I walked. I observed. I listened. I wrote - four stories actually that first day! Hey, I was up at 2:00 a.m., what else did you expect from me and my ever wandering mind? I have learned that the Lord is more pleased with my wandering mind than if I had a wandering heart.
Most of the time I am in the midst of life which is not always pleasant...same with you? bummer It is with intentional determination that I set aside moments to let my pondering, wandering mind rest. How long those moments are or how often and day or night are details I won't bore you with.
~~
Thursday I left for California.
Friday morning, which brings you current to this first writing, finds me refreshed, up early, feeling a bit frisky and filled with revelation, joy and a peace I have not known in years.
Are you curious how that came to be....if so lets continue the journey together. Would you mind waiting here while I go pour myself a fresh cup of coffee? This one is sooo cooled off it is not worth drinking.....
Ah, much better. Thanks for waiting for me.
My journey started on the way to the airport. To be kind as possible to all parties in this too long of a story, I will simply say at one point I made this statement to the driver not too long into the wee morning hour drive, "Is there a reason you didn't attempt to go AROUND the deer rather than driving right at them?"
The response was unfavorable. I understand what the silence response meant and opted for a side window view for the rest of that journey. That is after re-adjusting my body in the seat since the slamming on the of breaks tugged the seat belt into my nicely pressed blouse and I was in a more reclined state which was not how my body was actually feeling.
~~
The Portland airport was a cinch - in the beginning. I had done the e-ticket print from home so passed right thru that process.
At the security check point the shaky nervous man in line in front of me was asked if he knew he had a knife. Of course this was done after the two security people chatted and the one popped open the knife using her one hand which was really quite impressive to me. I opted out on asking if I could try that, just once.... The man's responsed, 'yes'. Then he moved on as she placed the knife in a toy box or some other sort of container where things that don't belong on a plane go.
Now it is my turn. Security pulled out my bottle of Amway water and informed me I could not take it on the plane. Oh, I thought to myself, drinking is not allowed. I assumed they meant the wine kind of drinking and did not realize bombs can be made from bottles of water but that was ok. I have thirsted before so certainly can endure it again. :)
To be kind, I did hear there was something recently in regards to safety and bottled water on the plane and do appreciate all that the staff do in the airports for our safety.
I did smile and log that moment in my brain for future reference while I put my shoes back on, and told myself this was the fun part and is a part of what makes an adventure fun!
~~
I am sitting in the terminal that the airport staff wrote on my ticket and directed me to. The time to board came. Only the mention of folks going to Sacramento was announced.
Hmmm
I inquired at the desk. Seems my plane had boarded at a different terminal but they would gladly call over to hold the plane. :(
I'm not thinking at this point - I am just DOING.
I board the plane and try to avoid eye contact of those seated who might be wondering who I could be or my story as to why I was so late. I coulda limped on or put on my princes crown for affect but instead kept my eyes on the seating numbers until I got to the seat where I had selected of all seats... the window. Now I had to ask 2 impatient looking men to excuse me as I squeezed past them.
I tried to pretend I was calm all the while fighting back grabbing an antacid or a few locks of my hair.
The plane engine starts up - we taxi. The engine noise quiets then increases to a more powerful determined 'I think I can' sound and before you know it, we are up, up and away...on....you guessed it...a great adventure.
I wonder if this sensation my body was feeling as the plane was reaching grand heights, was the same as life's quiet exclamations.
I had selected a window seat with a view of the wing. They didn't offer a seat with a view of both wings...bummer
I'm not sure what comfort I thought I would gain from my selection or was it I felt a need for entertainment while in flight. After all, the wing does have flaps that open and close. :)
The other view I got was the same as everyone else - people - all kinds of people on board searching for a familiar face, seat number or lavatory location.
Could it be, I wondered, is everyone searching somewhere for something?
~~
I looked out the window and had a birds eye view of our world. The homes and plots of land and cities below. It was all very lovely. Maybe that is why God can love us so. He sees the bigger view of things.
I can see homes scattered here and there. Small and large bodies of water, blocks of what appears to be fertile ground ready for harvest. ...and I wondered as I often do, if the people who inhabit that area know about those areas, those blessings, those treasures that are in the middle of what seems to be nowhere yet somewhere to someone.
Will thirsts be quenched? Will hungers be fed? Will longings cease?
~~
One of my sons has Asperger's. He has difficulty working through glitches in his day. I know him. I love him. I listen and watch quietly whether he rants or stomps or slams the doors. I wait nearby knowing that any minute he will walk back thru that door in a calm manner and be able to again tell me about the glitch and explain how he plans to work thru it using words rather than those aggressive gestures.
My eyes show him love. My quiet presence brings him the comfort he needs most in those moments.
My Jesus does that for me. I call him my Jesus but He is yours too! :) I ask often to see people or situations thru His eyes. It's most helpful, revealing and truly the clearest view. I feel His presence and touch throughout my night and days. There are times I find the most serene place to be and sit with my eyes closed. I lay a hand beside me and can feel Him cup my hand. The fragrance, His fragrance, I breath in. During those moments are the most sweetest and cleansing of my day.
I know what I know
And yet
There are times of struggle
When my eyes need to see
The way He does
When my heart needs to feel
The way His does
Why don't I
Why can't I
Bright Morning Star, hear my prayer
~N
And yet
There are times of struggle
When my eyes need to see
The way He does
When my heart needs to feel
The way His does
Why don't I
Why can't I
Bright Morning Star, hear my prayer
~N
~~
The plane banks to the left and then to the right. it all seemed meaningless to me and yet I am sure there was a purpose. I had to trust the pilot....did you hear what I said?
Through the two hour fight, random people walked to and fro or stood in the aisle. I wondered what their stories were. Are they traveling for business? Is this an escape trip? Will those seeking, find what they are searching for? Will our next stop in Los Angeles be their destination or will it be just another stop along their way, as it was with me.
And as these ramblings filled my head, I think of how this flight, this trip,is so parallel to my own life journey.
We can't change whats over, what has been, but we can change which way we go as we search for answers and hopefully do find answers along the way.
~~
We land in LA. As I walked down the bridge to the terminal entrance, it was a lonely walk. I know no one will be waiting to greet me. I thought to myself that someday, surely it won't be this way. Someday I won't find myself feeling so lost and empty.
I scanned the room for an attendant and asked directions rather than view the many friendly reunions that were taking place around me.
I show her my ticket and inquired which terminal I go to for the flight to Santa Barbara.
With her thumb and index finger she forms a one inch space, smiles and says, "Oh, you are taking the little plane."
Hmmm
I didn't know they came that little.
You can learn something new every day!
~~
I stand corrected....or so I thought
I had some very insightful conversations with my mom on this trip. Among other things, it turns out she has a concern that she was controlling.
...and so she asks of me..."is she?"...
She's my mom! I can't shake my head yes. I can't do the victory dance or YES arm gesture. It just wasn't appropriate.
So I sat across from her, listening, fascinated by her revelation and curious what her plans were with her self observation and wondered - simply because I do - how this recent discovery came to be.
I continued to listen and answer her questions with questions :) rather than offer up comments. I think she needed to get it out. I think she was working in an apology in there as well for past wrongs.
Bottom line is, deep down most of us have quirks, some more destructive than other folks. I am blessed with amazing children who help me see mine and allow me to reveal theirs as we laugh our way through them. Then we can move on.
Somehow, somewhere along the road, mom got stuck. Do you know people like that?
To me it was very sad really, but I had hope as she for the first time, seemed to have reached a point, a willingness, to move forward with help.
Whew! That is great I thought. I felt we made a break through. My groovy sister who lives with her will be so pleased and relieved to hear about it when she gets home.
Mom served up dinner and then we played our daily portion of Yahtzee. Suddenly the talk changed. We had come full circle back to playing the dead end game.
~~
It was a familiar and hard place to be. Yet, the night will fall. Tomorrow will come as it usually does. Mom will be mom as she usually is. A person can only do so much to help another then it is time to step back and let it go. Do not misunderstand, I don't mean give up but I was talking to the wind at that point.
~~
What I learned on this last grand adventure of my summer is that it's all the same - people and situations - life really.
Most of us look different, dress different and eat different foods at different times but underneath it all - well you know, most of us have something to work out. Some do, some don't or won't or can't.
Mom, may or may not continue her search in her own on way and in her own time, for the answers and freedom she needs. Most of all, I learned what my big sister knew all along...
Me, I'm opting for change in my life, for tomorrow to be better than today. I kinda sorta have a plan. I have tasted and felt what could be and am determined to not turn back now.
~~
I had great visits with one of my sisters and sister in law. I expected nothing less.
My sister and I grew a deeper bond which I thought was way cool. It was already cool that we both adore lavender! We went shopping. We don't like to shop - well, truth is she likes to buy shoes. Why were we shopping then? Don't be silly, ma told us to. She told us to eat lunch while we were too. Guess what!? We were rebels and DIDN'T.
My sister in law continues to amaze me. Wish I could take you on a field trip to her place and show you her Christmas village. I've seen it via email pics for years but in person it is breath taking and inspiring.
We had a nice and enlightening conversation on her patio where her ever so talented and kind husband served us yummy treats and YES, he provided chocolate! Dax, their dog, entertained us.
It is still amazing to me that we got along so well. For me it is a rarity to meet someone I feel so close to. She feels like a part of me and when I had to leave for home it felt like a part of me was being left behind. Do you know what I mean? Can you relate?
The conversation we had was not one I wanted to have but I could not have been in a more pleasant setting and with a more delightful person.
~~
I'm not ready for school which starts Wednesday for me but knowing what I know now, and having more answers to life's all too complicated at times situations will make it more manageable. I want to travel to depths of life I've not experienced and yet scared of that very road that leads to who knows where...
I really don't know where all I've learned and the path I'm headed on will take me but I'm trusting Jesus will turn the darkness to dawn and fill my heart and life with peace.
I think we all need to believe that as we walk our all to similar paths in all too similar patterns, to keep in our minds that when at times, it feels the world around us is breaking down, when the voices tells us to turn around, when we feel no longer able to dream - we will find Jesus holding the broken pieces, we will hear the voice of truth, and when it comes to those dreams - don't ever doubt the vast river of dreams you will be granted.
There you have my trip in California in a kinda sorta short long story. I'm not sure the number of words a short story can have until it becomes a long story. Do you?
Anyway, thanks for stopping by today.
And hey, thanks for being you
blessings
The plane banks to the left and then to the right. it all seemed meaningless to me and yet I am sure there was a purpose. I had to trust the pilot....did you hear what I said?
Through the two hour fight, random people walked to and fro or stood in the aisle. I wondered what their stories were. Are they traveling for business? Is this an escape trip? Will those seeking, find what they are searching for? Will our next stop in Los Angeles be their destination or will it be just another stop along their way, as it was with me.
And as these ramblings filled my head, I think of how this flight, this trip,is so parallel to my own life journey.
We can't change whats over, what has been, but we can change which way we go as we search for answers and hopefully do find answers along the way.
~~
We land in LA. As I walked down the bridge to the terminal entrance, it was a lonely walk. I know no one will be waiting to greet me. I thought to myself that someday, surely it won't be this way. Someday I won't find myself feeling so lost and empty.
I scanned the room for an attendant and asked directions rather than view the many friendly reunions that were taking place around me.
I show her my ticket and inquired which terminal I go to for the flight to Santa Barbara.
With her thumb and index finger she forms a one inch space, smiles and says, "Oh, you are taking the little plane."
Hmmm
I didn't know they came that little.
You can learn something new every day!
~~
I stand corrected....or so I thought
I had some very insightful conversations with my mom on this trip. Among other things, it turns out she has a concern that she was controlling.
...and so she asks of me..."is she?"...
She's my mom! I can't shake my head yes. I can't do the victory dance or YES arm gesture. It just wasn't appropriate.
So I sat across from her, listening, fascinated by her revelation and curious what her plans were with her self observation and wondered - simply because I do - how this recent discovery came to be.
I continued to listen and answer her questions with questions :) rather than offer up comments. I think she needed to get it out. I think she was working in an apology in there as well for past wrongs.
Bottom line is, deep down most of us have quirks, some more destructive than other folks. I am blessed with amazing children who help me see mine and allow me to reveal theirs as we laugh our way through them. Then we can move on.
Somehow, somewhere along the road, mom got stuck. Do you know people like that?
To me it was very sad really, but I had hope as she for the first time, seemed to have reached a point, a willingness, to move forward with help.
Whew! That is great I thought. I felt we made a break through. My groovy sister who lives with her will be so pleased and relieved to hear about it when she gets home.
Mom served up dinner and then we played our daily portion of Yahtzee. Suddenly the talk changed. We had come full circle back to playing the dead end game.
~~
It was a familiar and hard place to be. Yet, the night will fall. Tomorrow will come as it usually does. Mom will be mom as she usually is. A person can only do so much to help another then it is time to step back and let it go. Do not misunderstand, I don't mean give up but I was talking to the wind at that point.
~~
What I learned on this last grand adventure of my summer is that it's all the same - people and situations - life really.
Most of us look different, dress different and eat different foods at different times but underneath it all - well you know, most of us have something to work out. Some do, some don't or won't or can't.
Mom, may or may not continue her search in her own on way and in her own time, for the answers and freedom she needs. Most of all, I learned what my big sister knew all along...
mom will be mom
life goes on
it's all the same
life goes on
it's all the same
Me, I'm opting for change in my life, for tomorrow to be better than today. I kinda sorta have a plan. I have tasted and felt what could be and am determined to not turn back now.
~~
I had great visits with one of my sisters and sister in law. I expected nothing less.
My sister and I grew a deeper bond which I thought was way cool. It was already cool that we both adore lavender! We went shopping. We don't like to shop - well, truth is she likes to buy shoes. Why were we shopping then? Don't be silly, ma told us to. She told us to eat lunch while we were too. Guess what!? We were rebels and DIDN'T.
My sister in law continues to amaze me. Wish I could take you on a field trip to her place and show you her Christmas village. I've seen it via email pics for years but in person it is breath taking and inspiring.
We had a nice and enlightening conversation on her patio where her ever so talented and kind husband served us yummy treats and YES, he provided chocolate! Dax, their dog, entertained us.
It is still amazing to me that we got along so well. For me it is a rarity to meet someone I feel so close to. She feels like a part of me and when I had to leave for home it felt like a part of me was being left behind. Do you know what I mean? Can you relate?
The conversation we had was not one I wanted to have but I could not have been in a more pleasant setting and with a more delightful person.
~~
I'm not ready for school which starts Wednesday for me but knowing what I know now, and having more answers to life's all too complicated at times situations will make it more manageable. I want to travel to depths of life I've not experienced and yet scared of that very road that leads to who knows where...
I really don't know where all I've learned and the path I'm headed on will take me but I'm trusting Jesus will turn the darkness to dawn and fill my heart and life with peace.
I think we all need to believe that as we walk our all to similar paths in all too similar patterns, to keep in our minds that when at times, it feels the world around us is breaking down, when the voices tells us to turn around, when we feel no longer able to dream - we will find Jesus holding the broken pieces, we will hear the voice of truth, and when it comes to those dreams - don't ever doubt the vast river of dreams you will be granted.
dare to ask
dare to dream
tomorrow when you wake
you will find the old has passed away
good or bad
you will find a brand new day
filled with more blessings
and opportunities than you could have fathomed
~N
dare to dream
tomorrow when you wake
you will find the old has passed away
good or bad
you will find a brand new day
filled with more blessings
and opportunities than you could have fathomed
~N
There you have my trip in California in a kinda sorta short long story. I'm not sure the number of words a short story can have until it becomes a long story. Do you?
Anyway, thanks for stopping by today.
And hey, thanks for being you
blessings
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